Typically the longer you’ve been in a relationship the less likely you are to make time for date night. It happens to the best of us, so no need to fret. You get comfortable in a relationship and date nights turn into getting takeout and watching Netflix. This has certainly happened to me (no complaints here). But no matter how long you have been with someone it is always important to make time for an actual date night…like actually leaving your home and going out in public.
In the beginning of a relationship the dates are some of the most exciting parts, even after things are made official (remember those days when your relationship wasn’t “official” until it was listed on Facebook…). Planning where you’ll go and what you’ll do, getting all dressed up, putting down the phones and focusing on each other…ahhh the romance!
But if you’re like me then it’s easy to fall into a rut, get comfortable and want to stay there. My rut being pajamas, Thai food and binge watching new TV shows (do you really even need a man at this point?). I mean, who would want to leave that behind and go out into the real world? But for real, over time you run out of new ideas, get tired of going to the same places and may find that you just have less to talk about when sitting at a table alone for an hour or so. Meaning nights out get planned less and less often until one day maybe they don’t get planned at all… And I’m sure we all know that once you add kids to the mix this is almost inevitable. I wouldn’t know…but we’ve all seen it happen far too many times.
Before we go on I must say, if you have not watched the movie Date Night you seriously have to make time for it pronto. Steve Carell and Tina Fey play a couple desperately in need of a good night out and they get themselves into quite a few entertaining situations before sunrise. It is hilarious and Mark Walhberg is shirtless…I repeat: MARK WALHBERG IS SHIRTLESS, several times! So make a date night to watch Date Night and let me know what you think of it.
Moving on… I am here to reiterate that you absolutely have to make time for date nights! Speaking from my own experience, as I get older I see myself turning into an old married lady, which is not what I’m looking for at this age. So, I sprang from my rut realized a change had to be made. Now looking back, I realize how important it is to not let your relationship fall into a pit and I can see how often it is happening to others. But fear not! There is no need to panic and there are easy solutions to this issue.
I find that it’s easier to set a rule that once every 1 or 2 weeks you plan to set time aside to make date night happen. It could be the same night every week or you could choose to mix it up if you’re feeling wild or depending on what type of date activities you prefer. Either way, planning ahead will be your best bet of making sure you actually follow through and make this a regular occurrence.
Start by letting your significant other know that you want to incorporate more date nights into your relationship. They may not be thrilled with the idea, because as I said some people (ME) are difficult to coax out of ruts, but once they realize it’s a positive thing and will improve the quality of the relationship, how can they say no?
Date nights obviously include 2 people (maybe more if you enjoy group dates) so it’s important to make sure you both enjoy the night or at least make sure this is a compromise so every date night isn’t always one sided. Hell, the date doesn’t even specifically have to happen at after the sun has set. Maybe there’s a great brunch spot or an activity happening on a Saturday afternoon that suits your fancy. Whatever it is, just get your asses out there and enjoy each other’s company.
Put a little extra effort into your appearance if that makes you feel good, grab some flowers or do something extra special for the occasion, and for Pete’s sake, limit your phone usage to only 2 snapchats an hour! I kid…but I am notorious for having my phone glued to my hand and I know I’m not the only one. Putting it away shows your person that you are that much more focused on making the occasion special.
Making time for date nights will ultimately bring you closer together. This allows you to make new memories, meet new people, and explore new places. Netflix will always be there for you when you return. And I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have a nice date night in, just don’t let it become the ONLY date night you are having and maybe keep that TV turned off during dinner.
So just find new ways to incorporate date nights into your regular routine and it may cause you to take a little longer to finish that season of your most recent show, but life is all about balance. We will have plenty of time when we are older to stay in and take it easy. But right now, take the time you have and make the most of it (out of your pajamas).
Keep an eye out for my future posts for date night ideas!
Have you also realized you were in a relationship rut and found your way out? Let me know in the comments what helps snap you out of the rut and brings more spiciness to your relationship!